睡梦中被炸醒。。没有骗你

今天早上，真的是被炸醒。

不是开玩笑的炸，而是真的被炸。

大概在九点时，我还在赖床，因为可能太累，想再睡多点。

哇赛。。。。真的，突然“bomb”一声把握从床上炸下地板。

不是跟你开玩笑，那个比大地雷公还大三倍。

整条街的警铃都响了，太夸张了。

原来是后邻放汽油在他的火从里。

真的。。。我还没看过有这样的呢。

难道他不知道会这样吗？

冷~~~~

找到工了~~~开心~

今天去Prudential 保险公司去见工，说真的，没么信心。
因为自己没有其他的经验，今天也算我的处男interview啦。
哈哈哈，说真的，也太慢出来混了。
但是可能也不能怪我和我妈拉，因为以前真的怕我很容易学坏吧。

还真开心了~有工作做，有东西学。哈哈哈，不知道能学到什么，
但是希望会有收获咯。好好的学~~~以后才有成就~~
加油~~~

恐怖又累又爽的一天

大家好！！！ 我回来了！！ 哈哈哈，今天还真的是不可领域的一天。
今天早上，一大清早就和大学的朋友去打羽球。
可能真的事没做好热身运动，脚的胫有点拉到的感觉。
今天也不知道做么，打球一直打不中。哈哈哈，老了吗？

但是，回来的时候，总觉得不对劲。
站在们的旁边，没有听到吃饭的声音。（怪了~）
进去就看到妈妈很不舒服，还掉眼泪。。。
哇。。。 当时真的不知道怎么办。就关心关心她。
下午本来有去朋友家玩电脑。也只有取消了。。
还好看了医生，没什么大不了。。 太好了。。。

到了下午，一个还没见过面的朋友，约了我去和她朋友打羽球。
哈哈哈，本来有要打篮球的，都没有去了。
（sorry la~ 哈哈哈，难得有机会~人家也很可爱嘛~你们就别怪我了 =P)
我下到东林去接她再送她回家换衣服， 当时还真的让我吓倒后面的车。
哈哈哈，我记得到了一分叉路时，我问她那边？
她说“中间”。 哇。。。 还真的要我去树丛哦？
后面的车都不知道我要转哪里。LOL

到了她家后，哇塞~~还真多狗呢。。。 大概有20只吧。
虽然我不怕狗，但是有这么多只还真的不敢靠近。
我就在楼下等，等到她家里人回来，我就慢慢的退后。
说真的，不知道为什么她爸爸这么急。
快快的转进去。 （车下还有一只小狗）
呃~~~~ 剩下的，自己去想象吧。（真的会睡不着）
当时，差一点就吐出来了。。。 真的太血腥了。。=。=

别说那个~和她去的时候，聊了不少话~
说真的，她还真得很可爱~~
就像~~~ 可爱版的诗婷吧~
真的很爱笑，哈哈哈。
还真的可以看出为何有很多人追。
哈哈哈，今天可让我有眼福了~~

太太太太久没回来了~~

最近真的太闷了。哈哈哈，我知道家里有很多东西做，但是就是没太多的乐趣。
也奇怪，大学的朋友都有叫我出去打羽毛球，中学的朋友也有叫我打篮球。
但是就是很奇怪，总觉得好像缺了么的。
哈哈哈，可能就是想我每天讲的，“缺乏爱吧~”

我也好久没有和我的钢琴玩了，哈哈哈，它应该很寂寞吧。对不起啦。。。
如果没有工作的话，我要你陪我练到烂~哈哈哈，好好的和我练"all of me" 吧。
（更可怜的是我的二胡，几乎都没动了~可怜可怜~~~）

最近不知道要做么，就想要找工做。
我就叫朋友帮忙问问，最后来了一个做保险的。
（原来他们也有part time job哦？吓倒我）
不知道几时要去interview。 哈哈哈
说真的我的打工经验也不多。

真的只希望我的生活不会再走下坡了。
老天爷啊，我要求不多，就请你帮我找个温柔女友吧。
^^ 也偷偷帮我告诉她~我会让她幸福的。

Probably my blog would be my listener

For 10 months on searching, i still don't find a person that i could actually open my heart to talk with. More like, i need someone personal to talk. Someone special. But probably everyone is the same, searching someone that they could actually give their heart to.

I really like those people who could actually sit down, just by chatting with me. Well, cause when i didn't do much stuff, or even i do, i will chat with him/her until there's no topic left. [Unless i got important stuff] But i really don't want to bother people doing their stuff. I mean, it's okay for me, i like chatting up and down. Go out lim teh and gossip. So i won't mind. But there's people that actually find chatting while doing stuff disturbing. Kinda scared to being scold just because of that, or being irrespective.

Guess all i could do is to type into blogs. And probably not much people will read it anyway. LOL

hahaha inactive again~

Gosh, i am really not into blogging. hahaha..... being inactive with a short period. But also didn't seems to have any much stuff to write in my blog. My life seems to be the same all the time.

Last few weeks i remember i saw caren on hwang shang he. She was with her bf. Gosh, hahaha seems everyone is having their spouse. Really envy them somehow. Maybe because i don't have a special person that i can really talk with anything? i mean, when i am stressed out very much, i will have someone to know and cheer me up? and also when i am happy, i could share with a special someone? I know i can share it with friends, but face it. Sometimes friends will really need some of their own space. Cause they got their bf/gf and studies. They might not be there for you when you actually need it much. Plus, if i phone too much to a guy, they will say i am gay. If i phone too much to a girl, that girl get scared and may think i am chasing her. LOL

Also, recently i had chat with the girls around me on one issue. One issue that may be a fact that result a factor which is hard to chase girl. That is Vegetarian. Hahaha, it seems that many girls cannot accept vegetarian. Some i even got a reply which is VEGE Phobia LOL. Not so serious la, but just hate veges. It seems that vegetarian is very hard to accept, which is me. Other people thinks that vegetarian food is not so tasty and hard to shallow because it's just vege. Other than that, Vegetarian don't drink, and don't eat garlic and onion. Well, i think people went nuts after hearing that. After all those chatting, seems that everyone come out a solution. "CHASE A VEGETARIAN GIRL" lol. hahahaha like that's easy to find. Dang~

Oh well, seems gonna be staying single for a long long long long long long long long time

~* A busy and Hazy Life *~

1 month of University life is almost gone, and we only have 2 month more to go. Sometimes it really feels like time flies just like light speed. After awhile, we went to another Engineering 1st year, awhile later, we are on half of semester 2.

The weather in Miri isn't good these days, it's hazy because a lot of the forest in Miri were burning badly. I do doubt that it is still burning in this moment. Funny thing is, it's really rare to see the movement of the government to aid this kind of situation. I don't see police car patrol the area and so do bomba team. It's funny that to see how can they take their salary without feeling bad.

And i do saw one part of the newspaper today saying that, Kuching are appling "raining seed" system to sarawak, and aiding on miri's weather. But from how i see, the stuff is so expensive, even USA cannot afford to put it often. If my memories serve me right, the expense of make rain with raining seed is so expensive that they rather use air jets to get water from rivers and pour it in the forest. The reason behind that USA used the "raining seeds" are because raining is soft, and it's a large area, it is good for farming, instead of putting out fires. I don't know why the people wants to make rain with 400 thousands for making nothing.
p/s: however, i don't even think they are really using the real method. Cause it's WAY TO EXPENSIVE. And use it in Economic crisis? you got to be kidding.

My life went from a relaxing days into a busy life. Well, because all this sudden, i became the President of LifeStyle Club and Marketing of Geology Club. It's like every single week i got something to do with clubs. Plus, Engineering study are always busy too, sometimes i do scared that will i overcome these or not, and do everything well enough. Well, wish me luck~

Well, Things had changed a lot in this sem. I went into a class that not much people i knew. I can't find someone to talk in the class. Thinking back then, i had jenny the cute angel, vivian the dreaming queen, Siaw Tien the mysterious girl, Seng wei the funny cool guy......... Gosh, hahaha, really missed the old days. Now i rarely see them in the uni. Well, if it's compare the sem 1, yup, it's really rare. But maybe god want me to know more people too? Hahaha, but i really wish everyone i know can be in the same group together. Sob Sob~~~

~* 1st week on university *~

Well, EFY semester 2 starts in this week. And it welcomes all of us, EFY sem 1 students back to Hell. Personally, i think this time, we don't have much fun we can enjoy this sem. By seeing how the seniors suffer? I don't think sem 2 is going to be pleasant.

Moreover, i being pushed down to other class. I don't know much about the people in there, so i might having hard times in the future. Piff~ sometimes when i think of that. Really wish things can be different. But maybe this is god's will, to let me work with a lot of different people. And know what's in their mind, and know how lucky i am and continue the hardwork and follow god's footsteps.

Today, i went to a class called EFDP, Enginering Foundation Design Process. God, that Mr.Tan really are nuts. He said did we asked our seniors about the unit, and if they think it's fun or not. Obviously i had talked to some seniors, and they think EFDP is a unit that kills. Well, Everyone give the same reaction [no]. But then, Mr.Tan said, he should talk to our seniors, cause he think EFDP is fun.

At 1st, i was like... hmm.... ok. Maybe it's really fun, just a bit busy. But then, he said, we will have reports writting, starting this week. And we have at least 2 reports per week to write. Then i was like, "bloody hell? 2 reports to write per week and you said it's enjoyable and fun?". I got no idea what's that Mr.Tan is thinking. I think my study life in sem 2 is going to be ruined by that EFDP 100.

Poor kite

Well, i wish i got a good camera, to take the picture down when i go to the beach with those 2 lovely couple. Ezra went to buy a big kite, worth of RM 14 from super saves. Well, because he haven't play kite for 10 years. Then we went to tanjung to fly the kite. It was strange though, the wind was quite big but Ezra couldn't fly it up. I thought maybe there's a problem with the wind, then Ezra insist me to try fly it up. So i give it another few tries and seems it didn't work too. But i look at my side, i saw a ang mo flying his kite nicely, although it spin a lot. So i don't think it's the wind problem. So i went to check with the kite. YO RI KA~ it's the kite structure. it's not fully balanced each other, so it will twist to the right side when we tries to pull it up.

Well, after i fixed it, the kite flew up high, real high and with fast paste too. The wind were great, the kite can flew up quite smoothly. Seriously i wanted to flew to the highest place, then i get it down for Ezra to fly it with his spouse. Well, cause i know how it will feel when you let your girlfriend fly it and you stand at the back teaching her how to fly. The feeling is just sweet. But then, after it flew up very high, it's fully stable. I slowly slows down the rising speed until the line wheel stopped. Then i thought line is finished. Well, it did, but it doesn't tied on the wheel, so it flew up high and fly towards kampung area....... slowly slowly went........ Gosh~~~ kinda spoiled Ezra's plan..... don't felt good..... Sob sob.....

I really wish that kite can come back. But next time, i have to make sure it is fully tied at the wheel, or i might spoil the things again. T__________T

~*Not same class with old pals*~

Yup~ that's how i feeling now. Felt blue~ and quite left out~ cause i changed to group D (i guess). Jenny told me i am in Group X (why got so much group, i don't understand). But ya, gonna miss all those fun we had before in our class. Gosh, i don't think i really know anyone in group D. Think gonna better start solo again on the beginning, and see if there's someone i could rely on in the new group. Guess i really need to make new friends again. ^^ But i guess everyone are the same, we just don't like changing. The house, friends and environment. We might wanna try new stuff, but doesn't mean you want to keep it. ^^ Gah...... really gets blue when i know i am the only one who gone into the new group~ =S piff piff~~~

~*best gift on 2009*~

well, this is the late gift from one of my friends. It is the best gift i ever get on 2009. Well, the name of the doll called Bubu Bear. The original bubu bears look like the picture showed below. It's grey browned, and have a.... what do we call that? a tie? but anyway.... that's the doll.But the doll that i get looks a bit different because it can turn into something special. Something we can used for daily life. That's the coolest part of the gift, it can change into another object. i really like the doll~ Love it~

What object can it change into? well, guess it, if you get it right. i will chia you for a meal. =P

Cheese bake ingredience reminder

500g cream cheese
80g castor sugar
375ml thickening/whipping cream
3 egg yolks


3 egg whites
80g castor sugar (extra)
15g corn starch
60g plain flour


Just put here to refresh my memories XD

Man~ it's just too hot

Holy XXXX, damn this hot weather. Well, that would be the stuff i might say, cause it's REAL HOT. I don't know if it's just me or it's the weather, but things are just gone way hotter. I can't even stand the weather even by opening the fan which is facing me. Sometimes i even strip of my shirts and lay on the ground. Gosh, the weather is just killing me seriously.....

I guess global warming is really getting seriously now, i can't imagine how fast will the ice melted at the north pole. Well, speaking of which i also notice something, from last year. Thanks to my ex (i guess), it's been a long time since i go beaches. I think it should be around 1 year half that i never touches beaches again after she broke up with me. So last year, we had a BBQ on Tanjung and i noticed that the sea level wasn't so close to the shore before. Well, if i memories serve me right, there's a bridge made from stones, and on the beginning of the bridge, there's whole bunch of rocks, shape like a circle or oval. Back then, when my ex and me were on the beaches, i remember the sea level never reaches there, unless it's night, when the sea level rises. Now, it crossed over the oval shaped rocks. I think it just getting way and way seriously now.

Funny though, i can see the country on europe, australia are trying their best to save the world, while USA is finding solutions, but still on polluting the earth. Same goes to China. But the worst of all, i think it's Malaysia, i don't see a sign of the goverment moves on saving the planet. Probably too much rahsua? Who knows?

But the weather is really killing me, not only i can't sweat (i think it's too hot so i can't), the laundry can be dried for few hours. Not to mention it requires almost whole morning and afternoon to fully dried them. Seriously, i hope people can come up with something soon, cause i think people are going to be killed more by the hot weather than people killed by the nuclear weapons if this condition goes on. =.=

Gosh..... this weather is killing me........

Lol this holidays are just too long~

Well, the holidays are really just too long. LOL, and it seems like everyone are having their own days and enjoying themselves. But i think most of my friends would be enjoying the holidays. My holidays are like......... no money spending..... well, you get the picture. NO MONEY. lol, even go out lim teh i also sit there just for talking. Well, doesn't mean that i really need some drinks, cause the most important is to have some small gathering. Well, speaking of which, i kinda got used to the life without spending a penny in a day. That's back to the old days in high school. But this year, jenny keep chia me drinks and i kinda felt a bit shy. Because it's not once, but almost like everytime we went out. >.< hahaha, guess i need to treat her real well in the future ^^.

But ya, my holidays are quite boring, cause i don't have quite much money to spend. Most importantly, my fuel tank is nearly empty. Sometimes i don't even dare to drive it, i scare it will just break down after a small journey. Well, if they didn't asked me out for badminton or going out, i would be bored to death. So, should thank them for let me having a better holidays =P. I just hope the uni can start as soon as possible.

~*True colour of friends*~

Again, the picture doesn't connected to what i am going to write later, it's just a doll that i find it cute and adorable. ^^ it's called Bubu bears, even the name are cute. =P ya, i have 1 bubu in my house, it's a doll, but actually you can unfold it into a blanket. not really that nice on looking, but it serve nice blanket.

Well, it's been awhile before i update of my blog. I felt quite relief that there's much people come visit my blog time to time, i thank them for being a part in my life. ^^ for caring me. But ya, time had passed, it's obvious that we know more on the people around us. It's as we know their true face behind the mask. Yup, i think everyone had the same feeling or met some people are like, these. When you know him/her, they seems nice and friendly, but in the end, they are quite cruel and can even hurt a person without feeling sorry. Well, there's some people that who looked very fierce and cool but when you get to know them, they are quite friendly and nice person to be with too. Finally understand what our teachers told us in primary school, "never judge a book with its cover".

well, one of my friend was being emo, having relationship problems. In the same time, she had failed one of her subject. Well, i wish she can overcome that, and hope she can find a way to settle it. (don't ask me who). When i heard how she has been through, maybe she's more unlucky than i am, but i seems to feel the same pain, well when i broke up in my form 6, with my ex. But mine is 2 weeks before the finals, making me no mood for doing the exams, which further getting bad results. And ya, it's pain in the ass, when you got relationship and result problems at the same times, not to mention you got tons of pressure from your parents once you did bad on your exams. But i will be there helping her if she required any of them.

But seriously, i never know how will the friends around me will change, well, as in i finally uncover their real colours. Some are quite dissapointing, and the most i hate are those still act normal even they know they did wrong, and always find reasons for covering their mistake. I just don't understand how's that bad to admit on what you did wrong? piff~ But hey, i know something, pei min's friends are the best. =P well, some of the friends from other school are good too. It's just on ratio, pei min rocks =P

P/S : Jenny ling scare people taking her pictures. LOL

~* Guess life's like that *~

Hahaha, just posting this image because i think it looked so cool~ the person behind this should be really good on drawing.

it's been few days before i wrote anything again on my blog. I think mostly are because i don't feel like writing something. But thanks to Qi jia (my buddy) came back from KL, we been out quite often (almost like everyday) and hang out. Yup, hanging out a lot do wipe off the loneliness, which bothers me a lot. But still, i can't deny a thing, yes, i do still like Ruby. (but i think i don't really like jia jing already LOL) but anyway, i guess life is like that, when it's time to let go, it's time! or you may suffer again and again. Piff~ i wish i could change everything, but not saying that i didn't do anything wrong to her, but you know, angers sometimes just mislead a person. I guess the problems gets bigger and bigger, and because she don't want to fix anything, i guess there's no turning back. But she did asked me to bake a cake for her birthday, and she wanted to delay it to celebrate together. Guess what? her birthday is early June~ and now it's already July. I guess i will just bake one cake and deliver to her office and ask her friends to give it to her. Well, a promise is a promise~

Although i do really hate the things she have done, but i can't help it. I love her. Might as just forgive her and let her do anything she likes, including hurting me. Until i get another girlfriend (if someone really wants me LOL), i might just being alone and continue missed the old days with her. (yup, i always do, and i hate myself for doing so. That's why sometimes i do say "i hate myself")

~* Hopeless, Giving Up*~

Past few months, i still had some hope in my ex girlfriend. Wishing we can be together and start all over again. But yesterday, i just felt like, i want to discuss a bit about these things, so i phone her over. Yet, she told me straight she don't want to discuss anything about the past, nor the future. I think it should be anything that related to relationship. But the funny thing is, i think she's the one who wished to start all over. I thought i was the key, if i accept everything, we can be together. But in the end, it seems like, I were the one who caused everything to be like this (well, according to HER theory). She did nothing wrong and i was to be blamed. But she had forgiven me, forgetting the past, and accept the reasons that i were doing it (reasons? ok......). Fine, i take it. For the future, i can take it. Then i said, if i could have a second chance to replace everything, she said no~ (you forgive me, but not giving me another chance..... ok....) Then i said, do you wish that we could be together? (i make it straight so i can know it will waste my time or not). She said yes, but not now, but in the future. how long? 6 years later. She said, if we were meant to be together, we shall.

Ok, i accept it, but i ask her, by ignoring me for 2 weeks in a row, (meaning she can don't communicate with me for once in a 2 weeks) and do she think we will end up together? She said yes, if our FATE is there, we will be together. For her, SHE NO NEED DO ANYTHING AND WE WILL BE TOGETHER. it's like you no need to turn on the boiler, you will get hot water IF YOU HAD THE FATE. LOL, how can i even accept it? Once sze yee told me, about what her father said to his brother and i really really agreed a lot. her dad said "Even the god throw a bunch of gold or money to you, you won't get the money if you don't bend yourself and pick them up". Hell right, of course the fate is there, and you need to put some afford to get it. Can you even believe it? For her, after 6 years, if we had the fate. POOF!! we are couple again. Just like that, within a minute.

I didn't blame her on anything. I told her that, it's very bitter and why you won't understand when you missed someone and the person didn't want to talk to you (even because he/she is very busy). She said, if the reason are acceptable, it's ok. Yet, she still believe it, for 1 year. Then, i remember i was doing EFPC, i was busy on typing. She phone over, and i said, i'm busy. Find you again next time. At night, i reply the same thing again. Then i go prepare for quiz next day, then again, she phoned. I said, sorry, really not in the mood to chat, i am preparing for quiz. talk to you next time. Then, 3 days passed, i phoned her. I said, what you were finding me for? (like what she always said). She said, just to talk, and she felt very miserable for the past 3 days, without talking to me.

Wow, i thought she finally woke up. So i said, 3 days? then can you imagine how much pain i were in for 2 weeks without talking (including massage)? more over, once you left me a month! without any massage. How would i feel? Then she seems to understand (ya, she seems). Then we had some chit chats. I was so happy that time, it seems she finally woke up, i see HOPE. But guess what? well, you get the picture. After that, back to the original, she still ignore me time to time, until today.

Today, i woke up, i felt so miserable. I think this relationship is hopeless. Totally hopeless now. I think below hui ching, she's the girl that i cannot stand. I know she might not see what i type here, and i don't think she will ever know, cause i am so not going to hang up the phone again.

"Sorry Ruby, i just want to tell you, the Ruby i missed were gone. If this is the way you treat the one you love. Sorry girl, i don't even want to be your husband. I gave you 2nd and 3rd chances, and you don't even want to give me a 2nd chance. Sorry baby, you are not god, without you, i can still live, smile and have fun. Be your way, just like hui ching. One day you will know that what you lost and even you felt lonely, sorry not this time, I WON'T BE THERE FOR YOU."

Damn~ i feel so good right now. LOL

~* perfect day with a perfect weather *~

hahaha, it's a great day. Today i woke up around 7.30, and i thought i over slept. But true, if it's back to the old school days, i woke up around 6.00. But it feels really funny when i walk down from the stairs, and saw my mom still eating breakfast. Then i was like "huh? i thought mom always eat early?", but in my mind i think it's around 9.00. And i saw the clock, it's only 7.30. It's funny, i felt i slept enough, and i should be a late morning. Then, my mom wanted me to go out pay the bills, and help her to put money in the bank. I went out and opened my window as i always do. Well, i don't like air cone smell (they do have a unique smell, if you had bad system) and it saves fuel too (proven by MythBuster 2009 on Discovery Channel). And when i drove off, the wind is cool, not too cold, not too hot. It feels like a nature air cone, as if you are in Australia when it's autumn season. It feels so good, and probably because there's rain yesterday night (i think so), so the air is very refreshing. Gosh~ the weather is just perfect, if i had a good quality camera and bike, i might be off to take pictures around the miri and do some workouts at the same time too.

Damn~ I really need to find a day to go hiking. >.< The weather is getting better and better. But these days my brother didn't give me pocket money and my mom wanted me to stay at home. I really turn to be a pok kai zai.... no money on anything, on my phone, my tank fuel and my wallet. LOL want go see movie also don't know can see what leh~ cause no $$.

~* A crazy day *~

Thanks god it's raining now....... it was so hot in the evening... LOL speaking of which, i am having ache on my back, tummy and legs. Yup~ some workouts are always good, but i still don't think that's enough~ hahaha, i still want more. Might be planning to go mountain climb again if there's a good weather.

Today, i supposedly want to help my mom to register one application from TM net. It gives free local calls, meaning no cost if you phone house phone. (damn~ i wish i had a gf by now, so i can phone her every second. hahaha, i really missed old days). And if you phone handphones, it cost 30 cents per minutes. I heard it was 70 cents before, so it turn cheaper. And it even give a wireless phone. LOL how good is that? the only deal is adding RM 10 more to your streamxy line. LOL you are so going to see me phoning people around the area. but anyway, i was late from badminton match, so my mom left the house to do it on her own.

They funny thing was, i don't have keys to get in. I was hungry, thirsty and it was around 2.20+ pm. My neighbour came out and asked if i needed to phone my mom. i refuse and try to wait. I layed on the ground with my dogs and trying to rest. I waited until 3.30 pm, and she's not back yet. So, i decided to walk around the house, see if there's any place i can dig into my house (sounds like a theif). So i walk around the house, i saw that my mom didn't close the windows that i opened up this morning. (how careless of my mom, but thanks) So i get a Working Stair (i really don't know what it is called) but i put it on many places, and try to see if i can go up to the roof or not. Finally, i found a good spot, where there's handle that i could hold to get onto the roof. It's actually a skeleton of a old roof that my dad built around 10 years ago. I was scare it might break, but hopefully it can hold up to 80 kg load, haha. Finally i got in, ate something, have a bath and rest. My mom came back on 5 pm. If i were really waiting for her, i think i will be dead meat lying on the ground, LOL. It's just a crazy day~

~* Pei min Gathering *~

yesterday, we pei min students that still in miri had a small gathering on double star around 2.30 pm. It's really fun to gather around, having a chit chat about the times we have been through these years. It's funny that i see most of them are still the same, well including me, the clown~. But the funny part is, don't know why, people seems to treat me as a real baker. Haha, we had a small time talking about cakes, like how to do the topping or what cake should i bake next. But seriously not too sure myself, but i might want to try on something new, something that not very fimiliar with my previous recipe.

But still, undeniable, these are the friends that can believe fully (expect some of the guys). I find them that they are different than other students from other schools. Sometimes i really feel i was blessed, because they do appreciate things and treat and behave like normal people no matter what's the background of the person is. Maybe what we learnt in pei min is different than other school.... maybe. It seems that we treasure the people around us, stick together, forgive and forget. And i also thought that everyone will be going their own way, we might not having such big gathering after we went to university. But i was wrong.... and i was happy with it. But it let me feel relief that everyone is doing fine, and we are enjoying our lives. Haha, if i really had a girlfriend next time, i will take her to our gathering as well. Because i think they are the best friends i got.

p/s: i find love quite funny~ when you want it, it won't give it to you. Unless you try very hard.... but sometimes you fail too, even you do. But when you stop chasing love, it will come knock the door, like giving you chances. I don't know why, i just had that kind of thoughts~

~*~ Badminton Match ~*~

it's a good weather for playing badminton with my curtin friends. It should be the 5th or 6th times that we had this kind of gathering. Well, probably not like those dinner gathering, but i kinda enjoy when people exercise together. Sometimes it recalled the time when i was in middle school. There's one row of cars that only from our class, parking outside the basketball field or volleyball field. It makes me happy, don't know why. Probably knowing that we had the chance to spend time together?

My racket had turn into pieces~ (i mean the lines, lol) i can't even smash the ball (is it a ball? lol or feather ball~) with it. It will get stucked in my lines. So today i just borrow the rackets from those people that didn't play. It's one enjoying day, but i wish there's a guy or girl around my level to let me sweat even more. But speaking of which, jenny seems to improve quite a lot. And whenever jenny wins the match, she always smile and laugh. Somehow, her reaction is unique and quite cute sometimes. Vivian is the girl that always laugh from the beginning to the end. LOL

But i do wonder, why there's no people in my class that plays basketball? hahaha, or either volleyball? LOL. or i am just the only alien around. guess not ^^

p/s: I don't know why my friends put one ticket only, but they didn't get the saman~ because of the rain? but if my memories serve me right, there's not saman for the previous match. Did the warden didn't walk around those place? or we are just lucky? lol

*Appreciation*

It's a good morning on 22nd June 2009. I had a good sleep and when i woke up, i sat there and started to think..... I was thinking..... what would i be when i was really alone? like i always said i was. But kind to think of it, i wasn't. if i really was, how can i be the person i am now? Families and friends were there when i need some help. Although sometimes they can't give me some helps on the time in need, yet they had helped a lot, even my ex girlfriend. After thinking again and again, i don't know why the hell i was complaining so much for the past few years. I was so blessed and i didn't notice it and appreciate it.

Hence, i wanted to thank those people that really helped me during my hard times. Although i think most of them will not see it, but i thank you all with my heart. I want to thank.....

Father - for teaching me how to be a "human" and talk like one
Mother - for giving birth to me and make sure i was not spoiled
Eldest sister - always point out the things i did wrong
Second elder sister - for sewing my clothes and teaches me how to bake cakes
Third sister - for teaching me how to play piano and letting me know how important a family is
Youngest sister - for giving me pocket money so i can buy some foods during middle school time
Elder brother - for being truthful to me and as a replacement as a dad after my dad passed away
Ex Gf - for letting me know "face" and "people's view" are not important, is how you look yourseld does.

Xu Qi you - for being my basketball mate and showing me how lucky i was
Desmond Yii - for being my side for so long and always willing to help (although some of them went totally wrong)
Koh Qi Jia - for teaching me how to be optimistic and find a happier life and drive me out to have fun
Basil Chua - for letting me know how to enjoy my life
Shu Ling / Yi xiu - for cheering me up when i was down
Sze Yee - for being a really really nice friend and linster
Caren - for letting me know how should i treat a friend
Ting - for playing with me insanely in middle school
Yee Ping - Teaching me impossible can be possible if you really put your heart into it

Kian Lik - for letting me know i am a defensive person and take me out to have some fun
Ezra Lee - for letting me know, a person need confident and don't do anything that are worthless
Hye - for being a helpful person and being my listener
Vivian - for letting me know, how to cherrish those you love
Hui - for letting me know, succes come from 1% of knowledge, 99% of hardworking
Jenny - for being truthful to me and really showed me how holy person is
Fan - for letting me know how a good child to behave
Jayme - for cheering me up

there's too much people i should thank, but listing every single them are going to be very long. But seriously i am here to appreciate the things you had done. I really thank you all for helping me during these times, without you guys, I am nothing. Really really thank you all.....

~*~ Monster Hunter 2 ~*~

this is a game that i played recently. It is a very tough game, and it were introduced by Desmond Yii. This game are very challenging and realistic. If i were giving rating of this game, i would give it 4.5 out of 5.


Storyline: Monster Hunter 2 is a first person game. It all began when humans and monsters existed in the same world. Monster hunt each other for food, so are humans too. Humans tend to fight back with all their might. to strengthen themselves, they took the bones, scales, skins and head of the monster, and make them into their armors and weapons. People started to have peaceful life with hunters protecting the cities. Until one day, a black dragon flew over the world, and tear every single country. The world went into chaos, people starting to flee and fight for survival. People almost went into extinction, when one legendary hunter (YOU) came to aid the city.


Comment: The game is very tough and challenging because everything are close to realistic. Just imagine that you are a human, and you are fighting dragons, huge crabs or huge wild boar. Not like other games, the character do have special power that can eliminate a monster within few minutes with super powers. Hence, you only know different type of attack sequence and mix them yourself into a combo attacks. And a monster with 10 times your size can have huge amount of hp (life) and high attacking damage. It means that you need to hit a lot to bring them down, and they only need to deliver few hits to KO you. So playing this game really need to be careful and have to avoid being hit at all cost. Overall, it's just a good game.


This is the best equipment I currently had, it's made from crab's shell. (the picture that shown previously). It looks like a Rugby player, it's funny but it actually serve a good armor.



Currently i am hunting the female dragon, to make the equipment above. it looks nicer and looked more cool.

Current Boss: Legendary Wind Dragon
Description: The LWD came to the city and try to destroy the city. The hunters try to defend the city and pushed him back to the forest. And I was sent by the Leader of the village to fight him back to the icy mountain. Yet, he is just too strong, i can't manage to kill him yet.

~*~ Holidays' Plan ~*~

During this long holidays month, i actually planned to get a job and earn some pocket money. I actually had enough for my spending a month, but probably most of the money got leeched by the gathering of the curtin friends. To be honest, they are just too rich. The place they go are consider those rich people place (for me, it is). Hence, once i tag along, my wallet starting to burn. Maybe next time i should see whether it is needed to go or not.

My mom didn't wanted me to work, i guess probably because she's quite old and she needed accompany. Some people might say i can company her at night. But by knowing my dad had passed away for nearly 7 years, it's just too bad to left her alone at home. Just to imagine that how she would be in the house. Nobody to talk to, had nothing much to do, maybe just house chores, even me myself can't take this kind of life, whole morning and afternoon spending her time alone. Some may say, you don't talk to mom every single second, but when you notice there's people around that were doing something, it's a big difference. Just like when my mom wasn't around, i feel quite lonely too. I too felt a bit happy cause i get to do anything i want when i am alone at home, but when the time passed, i starting to felt the loneliness. No one was watching the TV, walking around or even doing laundry. Everything is just total silence, you can only hear your breathing.

These days, i were spending my time on playing Monster Hunter 2. it's a nice game, and it takes long time to play. For me, it also teaches me some lessons. I will talk about that on the next post~

The Panda is BACK!

For now and onwards, i think i am going to use English to write the blog. Because Mandarin takes a bit of time to write, also some of my friends can't read Mandarin. But it really feels good to be back to blogging, that's for sure.

I had lost most of the tracks of my past. Probably cause i didn't write them down. when i looked back, most of the time were precious, sweet, sour and bitter. but then are good memories.

After i broke with my ex, it seems that i am very desperate to have a girlfriend. I thought i totally got out of the hole that i were trapped in. I mean, i was done with my ex. But when i think it again, it seems that i wasn't actually got out of the area, because i was still sad, i still felt lonely, so i needed someone to cover the missing part of my soul. I kept on finding but i just can't find the girl i needed for my future. However, even i found some good girls, i think i will be rejected (with high chances).

The funny part was, when the time pass, and here's degree Sem 1, 2009. I was totally fine with single. That's when I know i am fully recovered from the pain. Although sometimes i still do feel loneliness, but it seems that everything is just fine. Sze yee even make her first wish on wanting me to have a girlfriend before august. But don't know, i am not willing to find any girls now, so going to dissapoint her anyway.